My Confession

I'm for the low man on the totem pole
And I'm for the underdog God bless his soul
And I'm for the guys still pulling third shift
And the single mom raisin' her kids
I'm for the preachers who stay on their knees
And I'm for the sinner who finally believes
And I'm for the farmer with dirt on his hands
And the soldiers who fight for this land

Chorus:
And I'm for the Bible and I'm for the flag
And I'm for the working man, me and ol' Hag
I'm just one of many
Who can't get no respect
Politically uncorrect

I guess my opinion is all out of style
Aw, but don't get me started cause I can get riled
And I'll make a fight for the forefathers plan
And the world already knows where I stand

Nothing wrong with the Bible, nothing wrong with the flag
Nothing wrong with the working man me & ol' Hag
We're just some of many who can't get no respect
Politically uncorrect
Politically uncorrect

(“Politically Uncorrect,” Gretchen Wilson feat. Merle Haggard)

Last night I was flipping through the channels, trying to find something that could hold my attention for more than five minutes. Somewhere between Omarosa and Janice cat-fighting on The Surreal Life and the White Sox/Angels game (that guy struck out, the catcher CAUGHT the ball), I found a show on CMT (which I NEVER watch) called “Gretchen Wilson: Undressed.” Now, I’m not a big fan of country music these days, but there’s something about this “Redneck Woman” that draws me in every time I see her. Perhaps it’s because she looks kind of like my cousin Rachel. Perhaps it’s that she’s just-this-side of white trash. Or, perhaps it’s because she’s one of the very few singers in the genre these days who can honestly call herself a “Country and Western” singer. Most of them are “Texas Country” or some sort of “Rock – Country” marriage that I just don’t understand.

Now, don’t me wrong, Keith Urban is hot and all that, and I still think Tim McGraw and Faith Hill are the most gorgeous music couple ever…but there’s just something missing in the genre these days. That “something” is the very something I grew up with.

I’m from Texas, as you all probably know by now, and while I’m more liberal than most conservatives, I’m certainly the most conservative of the liberals. I don’t wave the Confederate flag around, but I also don’t turn up my nose at the Blue Collar Comedy Tour and make fun of them. “King of the Hill” is almost too true to be funny at times, but hey, those are my roots.

As I was listening to Gretchen and her band play the above song on this show last night, something in it struck a chord (if you’ll pardon the pun) in me. I don’t need to reiterate the way music touches my soul or the way lyrics find a way of saying exactly what it is that I can’t verbalize. You all know that about me by now. And I started to realize how apologetic I am about my beliefs. There is still something deep inside me that is afraid that people won’t like me if they know all the things I believe. But in the end…what really matters? How many friends I have? Or the fact that I stuck to my guns no matter what the opposition said?

I have been called a hypocrite in my life before, and that word hurts more than any others. I think it’s because, in my heart, I know that I’m not one. But, it makes sense that I would appear to be one because my insecurities cause me to waver in my belief system at times.

Here are some things I believe, unapologetically. If you get pissed off and call me names, that’s okay. I will try my damndest to not let it bother me.

• I believe in God, the Father Almighty. I believe that I am a child of God and that I will answer to Him some day for my time on Earth and how I spent that time.
• I believe that George Bush is a good man. I would vote for him again.
• I believe that this country is going to hell in a handbasket, but I do NOT blame it on GB. I think it is all happening according to the prophecies in the Word.
• I believe that same-sex marriage is wrong. Does this also mean that I condemn homosexuals to a life of misery? God, no. I believe that homosexuality is a sin, as is told in God’s Word. I have gay friends, I want them to be happy…but I can’t condone the lifestyle. I just don’t think it’s right.
• I believe that I should marry Michael. But I also believe that divorce is wrong, and so I wanted to make sure I did everything in my power to make sure I knew that I wanted to marry him. Would I be jumping for joy if my kids wanted to live with their boyfriend/girlfriend? No. But I think if it staves off divorce in the long run, it’s been beneficial. It doesn’t make sense, but it’s what I believe.
• I believe in Heaven and Hell, in angels and demons. The latter of both scare me…a lot. It’s nice to know I won’t have to see either.
• I believe that Christians are the main thing turning people OFF to Christianity. I think that Christianity is becoming a fad and that “judgment” and “condemnation” have taken the place of compassion and forgiveness.
• I believe that infidelity is wrong. If it even happens on tv and I’m watching it, I get upset. I am so in love that I can’t imagine how it would feel to have that in my life.
• I support the war in Iraq and the war on terror.
• I pray every day. Even if it’s just a little bit. When I was a kid I used to think that if I didn’t pray eloquently and “preacher-like” that God didn’t listen. Now I talk to Him as if we’re buds.
• I have terrible language, and I know it makes people go “Pffft, what a hypocrite.” It’s something I need to work on. You’d think that having an English degree would allow me to find a more articulate way of expressing myself…
• I know I’m not perfect. I’m living and sleeping with a man I’m not married to. This will be rectified as soon as possible. But I don’t feel like a terrible person. At. All. And I expect the same love and respect that I try so hard to give those that I disagree with. Judging never helped anyone make friends.
• It’s so nice to be “equally yoked.” When I get “riled” or hot about something, 9 times out of 10 I know for a fact that Michael feels the same way.

Anyway. I don’t know why I felt so inspired to say all these things. I’m sure I’ll go back to my normal blogging material of annoyances and sexual fantasies (haha) tomorrow or later today even.

I’m a complex person. Deal with it. :)

~Frecklehead