PMS
So many things these letters stand for:
Poorly Mothered Sasquatches
Poopy Monkey Shoes
Prissy Manolo Sandals
Pre-Meditated Sadism
Pretty Masturbating Seals
You get the idea.
I just wish that every month I was able to somehow get past, emotionally, this curse that makes me fall apart every third Wednesday. I can't even watch an episode of Sex & The City without wanting to cry because Aidan broke off the engagement with Carrie.
This is not a good time of month to go to callbacks for a show you really want to get cast in.
I actually performed really well last night, I thought. The choreography was easy, I sang well (as well as just about anyone can when sightreading Sondheim stuff) despite the fact that we learned the stuff really quickly and had to sing it in pairs due to the large number of women there.
But I'm really confused.
When the assistant (a woman with the initials K.G. who really really likes me) was handing out the scene packets to the women, she was telling us which parts we were being considered for and therefore needed to read the scene for. I put down that I would take the following roles: Little Red Riding Hood, Cinderella, The Baker's Wife, the Witch, Rapunzel. K.G. told me to read for Cinderella's Mother. Not only not one of the roles I said I would accept, but also NO SCENES to read because she doesn't speak. She's dead. And her spirit lives in a tree. I think she sings like one time, maybe twice, in the show. Probably a great role...for a motherly figure who is about 20 years older than I am! The women they had reading for Cinderella were older than I am!
In order to be as professional as possible, and keep my integrity, I told K.G. that I was really not interested in that role, and she said, "Oh okay, but still read anyway. I'll let them know, they may be looking at you for something else." Okay. Cool. So I asked K.G. what to do since Cinderella's Ma didn't have any lines, and she said, "Read for anything you want." Obviously I chose Little Red because that was my first choice. I read with a fellow Pippin-ite from two summers ago. He read the Jack to my Little Red and we did really well. They had me read for her again, and K.G. said they really liked my Little Red. Cool.
Then comes the most humiliating audition experience I've ever felt in my life. The directors and staff have all the called back stand in a long line. Then he starts calling out names to stand together in a new line up front so he can "see people together." Then after he has about what the cast would look like, he starts calling other names to replace people in the first line. When all was said and done I was one of THREE PEOPLE not called AT ALL. And all the friends I have as well as the acquaintances I made while auditioning kept looking over their shoulder and giving me these sympathetic looks which just made me want to scream.
I'm not kidding, it took every ounce of strength that I had to stand there in my best model pose, shoulders squared, chin up, "Chorus Line" position and not just run from the room in tears. I felt like the fat girl in elementary school again. Then the director said the dreaded words, "That's all I need to see." I couldnt' help feeling my shoulders just droop.
Right about the time we re-formed our long line, I see Michael peek his head in the doorway because he's just arrived to pick me up. He gives me the most loving, adorable, hopeful smile and this little thumbs-up. I guess my facade worked...I must have looked confident or something. They said they'd post cast today, and call everyone either way...whether or not he or she was cast. I haven't gotten a phone call and, as of 2pm the cast list wasn't posted at the theatre. So now I'm home.
Now. I know things could change. I could be eating my words when they post the cast list. But I highly doubt it. I just feel like shit right now. Literally and figuratively. I don't feel very good (nauseated and tired), and I feel depressed.
Poorly Mothered Sasquatches
Poopy Monkey Shoes
Prissy Manolo Sandals
Pre-Meditated Sadism
Pretty Masturbating Seals
You get the idea.
I just wish that every month I was able to somehow get past, emotionally, this curse that makes me fall apart every third Wednesday. I can't even watch an episode of Sex & The City without wanting to cry because Aidan broke off the engagement with Carrie.
This is not a good time of month to go to callbacks for a show you really want to get cast in.
I actually performed really well last night, I thought. The choreography was easy, I sang well (as well as just about anyone can when sightreading Sondheim stuff) despite the fact that we learned the stuff really quickly and had to sing it in pairs due to the large number of women there.
But I'm really confused.
When the assistant (a woman with the initials K.G. who really really likes me) was handing out the scene packets to the women, she was telling us which parts we were being considered for and therefore needed to read the scene for. I put down that I would take the following roles: Little Red Riding Hood, Cinderella, The Baker's Wife, the Witch, Rapunzel. K.G. told me to read for Cinderella's Mother. Not only not one of the roles I said I would accept, but also NO SCENES to read because she doesn't speak. She's dead. And her spirit lives in a tree. I think she sings like one time, maybe twice, in the show. Probably a great role...for a motherly figure who is about 20 years older than I am! The women they had reading for Cinderella were older than I am!
In order to be as professional as possible, and keep my integrity, I told K.G. that I was really not interested in that role, and she said, "Oh okay, but still read anyway. I'll let them know, they may be looking at you for something else." Okay. Cool. So I asked K.G. what to do since Cinderella's Ma didn't have any lines, and she said, "Read for anything you want." Obviously I chose Little Red because that was my first choice. I read with a fellow Pippin-ite from two summers ago. He read the Jack to my Little Red and we did really well. They had me read for her again, and K.G. said they really liked my Little Red. Cool.
Then comes the most humiliating audition experience I've ever felt in my life. The directors and staff have all the called back stand in a long line. Then he starts calling out names to stand together in a new line up front so he can "see people together." Then after he has about what the cast would look like, he starts calling other names to replace people in the first line. When all was said and done I was one of THREE PEOPLE not called AT ALL. And all the friends I have as well as the acquaintances I made while auditioning kept looking over their shoulder and giving me these sympathetic looks which just made me want to scream.
I'm not kidding, it took every ounce of strength that I had to stand there in my best model pose, shoulders squared, chin up, "Chorus Line" position and not just run from the room in tears. I felt like the fat girl in elementary school again. Then the director said the dreaded words, "That's all I need to see." I couldnt' help feeling my shoulders just droop.
Right about the time we re-formed our long line, I see Michael peek his head in the doorway because he's just arrived to pick me up. He gives me the most loving, adorable, hopeful smile and this little thumbs-up. I guess my facade worked...I must have looked confident or something. They said they'd post cast today, and call everyone either way...whether or not he or she was cast. I haven't gotten a phone call and, as of 2pm the cast list wasn't posted at the theatre. So now I'm home.
Now. I know things could change. I could be eating my words when they post the cast list. But I highly doubt it. I just feel like shit right now. Literally and figuratively. I don't feel very good (nauseated and tired), and I feel depressed.
posted by Sassy at 3:43 PM
1 Comments:
I know exactly how you feel. (sorry if I was less than eloquent on the phone) When I auditioned for Godspell out in Garland, the exact same thing happened to me when they began the dance audition. They would call people up, then more, then more and finally it was me and ONE other guy standing in the back with our thumbs up our asses. I felt like garbage. Horrible. You need ice cream! :-)
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